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How to handle holiday tipping, dress codes, and trauma parties

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The holidays are here again, which means re-watching "Die Hard," eating too many cookies, running into your high school bully at your hometown grocery store, and verbally sparring with your racist uncle who is 100% convinced your iPhone is working for the deep state.

As fun-filled as this time of year can be, it can also force a plethora of sticky situations and quizzical conundrums for us to deal with.

Soundside has rounded up a panel of etiquette and relationship experts to answer your toughest holiday questions: Arden Clise, Seattle-based etiquette expert and author, along with Lindy West and Meagan Hatcher-Mays, the hosts of the KUOW podcast Text Me Back!

Holiday tipping

The holidays are a great time to show a little extra appreciation for the people who make our lives easier.

When it comes to determining the amount, Clise suggests keeping in mind factors like the cost of living in your area, your relationship to the person, and the amount of time they spend working for you.

If you want to show your appreciation to a government employee like a mail carrier — avoid cash.

"No cash, and the gift has to stay under $50. But a small gift [like] a plate of cookies, you can absolutely offer to a mail carrier or teacher," Clise says.

Here's Clise's tipping suggestions for other professions:

  • Dog walker


"Your dog walker should get up to one week's pay or a gift," Clise suggests.


  • Babysitter of daycare staff


"Your daycare staff is going to get one weeks worth or one month's worth of pay depending on how often your child goes. Your babysitter is one day's worth," Clise says.


  • In-home health aide


One week's worth of pay for them is an acceptable tip, according to Clise.


Listen to the full segment with Arden Clise, Lindy West, and Meagan Hatcher-Mays by clicking the play button at the top of the story.

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